The B**** Word

Disclaimer: I do not use the B word (bitch) in my general vocabulary but for the purposes of this message it has to be used.

Definition of bitch;
noun
1. A female canine animal, especially a dog.
2. Offensive
a. A woman considered to be spiteful or overbearing
b. A lewd woman (definition of lewd: a) preoccupied with sex and sexual desire; lustful b) Obscene; indecent. 2. Obsolete wicked)
c. A man considered to be weak or contemptible

verb, informal- express displeasure; grumble

For those who feel more comfortable with the Urban dictionary; you can look here to see words related to bitch.
Bitch- Modern-day servant; A person who performs tasks for another, usually degrading in status.

Why do I have to go through ALL of the above definitions? Simply to show how there's no positive definition for bitch. Now before you attack me, as a Human Rights student, I live and breathe Human Rights. I am very aware of 'one's freedom of speech and self expression' and I respect your right to that. For weeks now I have painfully resisted writing on this topic because I didn't want to offend anyone as I know so many people who casually throw around the B word like it's no big deal and may be it isn't to them. 

My analysis 

How can one use the same word to express LOVE and HATE? e.g I love my bitches, I hate that bitch, my bitches and I, my bitch is better than yours. Sometimes I want to ask people if they even give a slight thought to some of the things they say/put out. Please, go ahead and explain this to me. Is one trying to say 'my lewd woman is better than yours? My female canine animal and I? And isn't it dehumanizing likening people to dogs? Are the people you refer to as bitches counterfeit human beings? What is SO okay with likening someone to an animal? 

Why am I getting worked up about this? For one simple fact, 'In dehumanizing others, we exclude them from the circle of moral obligation. We can then kill, oppress, and enslave them with impunity. Taking the life of a dehumanized person becomes of no greater consequence than crushing an insect under one's boot.' (Dehumanization, Genocide, and the Psychology of Indifference) Link  You're probably thinking that your words cannot lead to such extreme consequences but yes, they can. Words have that sort of power.

Thing is, we say stuff without giving thought to it because we don't even have the time to think. Keep calling your friends bitches and soon they will become spiteful or overbearing because that's the sort of life you are speaking into them. Why can't you call your friends something positive? If you want to stick to using a word with the letter 'B' we can use BEAUTIFUL. What better word than that? 

Enjoy your telly, movies and music but know what's good for your inner being. The music, the movies and your fave celebrities will tell you that it is okay to go around calling everyone, friends, enemies, frenemies bitches, but those guys are SELLING products. Have your own mind and know what's life and what isn't. What's even more disturbing is the world knows that vulgarity and profanity sells. What does that say about us? There has got to be a generation that stands up against ridiculous trends. 

100 wise words

I love reading in bed, you know that time right after you snuggle under the covers. (I love bed time, the bed is a sanctuary) Reading in bed gives me great stuff to think about before I fall asleep. So I came across this divine blog by Bianca Olthoff, and I found myself laughing so hard. Ghosh I am a sucker for a good laugh, it's how she says stuff that actually makes it funny. *laaawwd have mercy*. Anyhow feel free to check out her blog in the name of love.

I got this post from Bianca's blog site and I thought I should "legally" transfer it to mine mostly because it's simple and I love simple things. Enough prattle, here are the 100 wise words a high school teacher passed on to his students.

• 1. There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs is not one of them.
• 2. Never cancel dinner plans by text message.
• 3. Don’t knock it ‘til you try it.
• 4. If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.
• 5. Always use we when referring to your home team or your government.
• 6. When entrusted with a secret, keep it.
• 7. Don’t underestimate free throws in a game of horse.
• 8. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
• 9. Don’t dumb it down.
• 10. You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.
• 11. If you’re staying more than one night, unpack.
• 12. Never park in front of a bar.
• 13. Expect the seat in front of you to recline. Prepare accordingly.
• 14. Keep a picture of your first fish, first car, and first boy/girlfriend.
• 15. Hold your heroes to a high standard.
• 16. A suntan is earned, not bought.
• 17. Never lie to your doctor.
• 18. All guns are loaded.
• 19. Don’t mention sunburns. Believe me, they know.
• 20. The best way to show thanks is to wear it. Even if it’s only once.
• 21. Take a vacation of your cell phone, internet, and TV once a year.
• 22. Don’t fill up on bread, no matter how good.
• 23. A handshake beats an autograph.
• 24. Don’t linger in the doorway. In or out.
• 25. Always say please and thank you.
• 26. If you want to know what makes you unique, sit for a caricature.
• 27. Never get your hair cut the day of a special event.
• 28. Be mindful of what comes between you and the Earth. Always buy good shoes, tires, and sheets.
• 29. Never eat lunch at your desk if you can avoid it.
• 30. When you’re with new friends, don’t just talk about old friends.
• 31. Eat lunch with the new kids.
• 32. When traveling, keep your wits about you.
• 33. It’s never too late for an apology.
• 34. Don’t pose with booze. 
• 35. If you have the right of way, take it.
• 36. You don’t get to choose your own nickname.
• 37. When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.
• 38. Never push someone off a dock.
• 39. Under no circumstances should you ask a woman if she’s pregnant.
• 40. It’s not enough to be proud of your ancestry; live up to it.
• 41. Don’t make a scene.
• 42. When giving a thank you speech, short and sweet is best.
• 43. Know when to ignore the camera.
• 44. Never gloat.
• 45. Invest in good luggage.
• 46. Make time for your mom on your birthday. It’s her special day, too.
• 47. When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.
• 48. Sympathy is a crutch, never fake a limp.
• 49. Give credit. Take blame.
• 50. Suck it up every now and again.
• 51. Never be the last one in the pool.
• 52. Don’t stare.
• 53. Address everyone that carries a firearm professionally.
• 54. Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.
• 55. If you’ve made your point, stop talking.
• 56. Admit it when you’re wrong.
• 57. If you offer to help don’t quit until the job is done.
• 58. Look people in the eye when you thank them.
• 59. Thank the bus driver.
• 60. Never answer the phone at the dinner table.
• 61. Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
• 62. Know at least one good joke.
• 63. Don’t boo. Even the ref is somebody’s son.
• 64. Know how to cook one good meal.
• 65. Learn to drive a stick shift.
• 66. Be cool to younger kids. Reputations are built over a lifetime.
• 67. It’s okay to go to the movies by yourself.
• 68. Dance with your mother/father.
• 69. Don’t lose your cool. Especially at work.
• 70. Always thank the host.
• 71. If you don’t understand, ask before it’s too late.
• 72. Know the size of your boy/girlfriend’s clothes.
• 73. There is nothing wrong with a plain t-shirt.
• 74. Be a good listener. Don’t just wait for your turn to talk.
• 75. Keep your word.
• 76. In college, always sit in the front. You’ll stand out immediately.
• 77. Carry your mother’s bags. She carried you for nine months.
• 78. Be patient with airport security. They’re just doing their jobs.
• 79. Don’t be the talker in a movie.
• 80. The opposite sex likes people who shower.
• 81. You are what you do, not what you say.
• 82. Learn to change a tire.
• 83. Be kind. Everyone has a hard fight ahead of them.
• 84. An hour with grandparents is time well spent. Ask for advice when you need it.
• 85. Don’t litter.
• 86. If you have a sister, get to know her boyfriend. Your opinion is important.
• 87. You won’t always be the strongest or the fastest. But you can be the toughest.
• 88. Never call someone before 9am or after 9pm.
• 89. Buy the orange properties in Monopoly.
• 90. Make the little things count.
• 91. Always wear a bra at work.
• 92. There is a fine line between looking sultry and slutty. Find it.
• 93. You’re never too old to need your mom.
• 94. Ladies, if you make the decision to wear heels on the first date, commit to keeping them on and keeping your trap shut about how much your feet kill.
• 95. Know the words to your national anthem.
• 96. Your dance moves might not be the best, but I promise making a fool of yourself is more fun than sitting on the bench alone.
• 97. Smile at strangers.
• 98. Make goals.
• 99. Being old is not dictated by your bedtime.
• 100. If you have to fight, punch first and punch hard.

xxx

FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE

Lorde - Team

Lorde - Tennis court

Lorde - Buzzcut season

Zedd ft Hayley Williams - Stay the night

Jessie J - Thunder

*******************

HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR LOVERS... :-) I cannot believe it's been almost two years of breakthrough. Where does time go? I know it's only just January but who feels like we are half way through the year? So much to do, so little time. Who has made resolutions for the new year? Anyone? Well, I haven't made resolutions this year because I want to be able to allow myself to dream into the year. I want to be able to adjust to whatever the year brings without feeling bad about not attaining my set goals. 

'While resolutions are about “shoulds,” dreaming is about hope — and who we may become.' (Whitney Johnson) I am a sucker for hope so I automatically believe in dreaming. I challenge us this year to concentrate our efforts on what we hope for and not on what we shouldn't do. I want you to FIGHT for your life. 

I was listening to mama Joyce podcast and she taught these 6 things we should do on purpose in our lives. You know me, I am not one to sit on great advice especially if it's going to help us live this life to the fullest. I mean, who doesn't want to be happy? I am yet to meet a person who hates happiness. 

Things to do on purpose this year

1. Stay busy blessing anyone and anything you can bless. Wake up in the morning and bless your day, bless your parents, bless your work place, bless yourself while you're at it. If you like to play like I do, you can pretend that you are a blessing machine. (you're welcome for that play tip * wink *) By speaking life into your own life, you're able to overturn the negative confessions made by others on your life.  

2.Be thankful and SAY SO. We need to actually open our mouths and say what we are grateful for. Do not assume that people know how you feel about them. Don't expect telepathy to work all the time. Don't say 'oh God knows I am thankful', sure He knows, but do YOU know that YOU are thankful? Tell people you are thankful for them, tell God you are thankful for His blessings.

3. Edify, encourage and build up other people. We live in a world where discouragement is served like Gru's hot pancakes. Let us say something to someone to cheer them up, to lift discouraged people up. Make that commitment to be that person everyone comes to for encouragement because you can't help but speak excellent things to those around you. 

4. Tell the truth and tell it in love. Check your motive behind telling the truth, if your motive is malicious, I would suggest you check yourself...and check yourself thoroughly. 

5. Speak the word of God to your situation. The year has only began, and we don't know what the months ahead bring. Despite the uncertainty we know we can be prepared for anything. You have ALL the power and authority to overcome so much. Do not be afraid of the unknown, instead rely on God's promises for your life. 

6. Do not talk too much. Be quiet.You do not have to let your opinion known every single time. (oh oh...I so need this one) Be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.

******************

You know those people who are experts in self depression? Yeah, stay away from them. You know why?  They are the perfect recipe for contagious depression. 

I really want you to ponder on this deeply. How do you talk to yourself about yourself? The way we talk to ourselves is very important and we need to pay attention to that. I don't know how strongly I can emphasize this. Do not say nasty, awful, self deprecating things to yourself because you simply cannot rise above your own confession. You need to completely destroy all rooms occupied by negativity. 

Be very careful almost like applying CIA standards on who you let into your inner circle. I don't mean you can't associate with negative people, you can, but you cannot allow them to "turn you". Let your positivity draw them to desire what you have. You must protect yourself from negativity or you may easily find yourself in the dark rooms of depression. If you are one of those people whose superpower is negativity, I urge you to try out positivity. 

Tell yourself you are beautiful, you are handsome, you're a hard worker, you're favoured, you're kind, you're intelligent, you're a giver, you're great to be around, you're the head not the tail above not beneath. etc. It is amazing what can happen when we say things and do things on purpose. Fight for your life! 

I love Lady Violet Crawley's positivity in Downton Abbey...it really is such an admirable trait, 'I take everything as a compliment, it saves many an awkward moment.'